Tuesday, September 30, 2003

it's a sunshine day

no, truly it is. sometimes days are just sunny, or nice, or whatever, but when they're really amazing they could be considered sunshine days. either that or i'm just rambling on for no particular reason. yeah, that's probably it.

i thought i felt like writing, but perhaps i was wrong.

well one thing's for sure. i'm even dumb-er than i thought. like, so dumb i'm embarassed to even admit how dumb or why. god help me. how could i have misunderstood tony pierce's review of the white stripes show so thoroughly? well, one reason is that i'm so far out of the new music loop that i can't even see it from here ("loop? where are you? i miss you...") and another reason is that i spread myself so thin sometimes that i only catch about 10% of what goes on in the world around me. so. here we are. dumb and dumber. today, i was loading my mp3 player for my trip to the gym and discovered in my "my music" folder a track labeled "seven nation army--white stripes". and i nearly fell out of my chair as i was bombarded from all sides (frontal, perietal, cerebral...) by revelations. everything was as clear as, well, as a sunshine day. fuck me gently wtih a chainsaw.

ooh! that reminds me--whoever's excited for the new Texas Chainsaw Masacre, raise your hand! well, it's hard to type one-handed so mine's back down, now, but it was up for a second there....for some reason that movie scared the fuck out of me (seriously--i was celibate for a whole day after) even though it was so B-movie. Actually i know the reason, so i'm not sure why i wrote that in such an annoyingly vague manner: the reason it got to me was that it was based on a true story....watching that girl run away to safety, FINALLY, at the end just wrenched my guts. i had really put myself in her shoes and it freaked me out with such an intensity as i haven't felt since Dean Koontz's Intensity. as cornily as that worked out, it's true. that book fuckin shook me to the core.

okay. so anyway. lots to do today. if you see tony, tell him i'm sorry for being the dumbest ass of the dumb asses--or better yet, try to convince him that i'm actually not as devoid of IQ points as i may have seemed....sniff. you know what that experience reminds me of? being a freshman in high school--shy as all get out, glasses, braces (yes, a bit like the girl in my geek story but not as severe) and having a gorgeous, popular senior who sat by me in study hall ask me some inane question and get the dopiest answer possible........sad. pathetic. good thing i grew up and into myself and can talk to boys now. ahem. and i'm only a complete idiot sometimes. that's good enough for me! =) way to set my sights low...

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