Monday, January 19, 2004

sick children

and no, not in that "good way" that the kids are all using that word these days.
whatever the hell it means.

i can't think of a damn thing to say.
why does that make me panic??

i wish i had a soundproof room i could lock myself into.
and a nanny.
just so i could write something--work on that stupid book, write a longer short story than one paragraph.

sweet.
i just got an email with a hyperlink that said "click here to enlarge your penis now".
i wonder how many people will fall for THAT.
you know, like those emails claiming that something funny will happen to your screen if you forward this to 10 people.
blows my mind that people are that gullible.
or compulsive.
i have made it my personal mission to stop all such transmissions that come my way.
bad luck awaiting me?
bring it on.
a missed opportunity to get a gift certificate from some unsuspecting retailer?
good, i hate their shit anyway.
little johnny's going to fail his science project?
i hope he does.
little timmy needs a transplant?
doubt it.

anyway.
winter always makes me restless.
well, more restless than usual.
i need an adventure.
i'm even thinking that by this summer the boys will be ready to go adventuring with me.
we can go hiking any time i want.
we can check out the new reservoir at the edge of the canyon.
where, i might add, i might just be comfortable in my swimsuit for the first time since the little parasites starting abusing my body.
and summer's not so far away, if you live in utah.
probably another month and we'll start having warm days.
then another few weeks and we'll get snow, then heat......
then more snow, then more heat....
eh, whatever.
at least i'm not in Maine...
(yes, i'm grinning sheepishly....)
but they'll be frozen over for at least two more months.
spring doesn't even begin to show its rainy little head until march.
the rain lasts until june.
and it's not warm, sunny rain.
it's cloudy, tempestuous, angry rain.
it's cold, muddy, stinging rain.
utah's weather is great.
i just wish we could export all the annoying people and import a bunch of normal ones.
saw a billboard last night for an all-mormon cruise.
let's get our heads out of the sand people.
they live in fear of coming into even the most brief or indirect contact with anything outside their realm of beliefs.
heaven forbid they sit across the table from a nice protestant couple from Arkansas enjoying a glasss of wine with dinner.
or hear a dirty joke at the comedy club.
or a--gasp--SWEAR WORD.
you don't want to get me started.
i have way too much to say on this subject--and most of it would be rambling angry and incoherant.

i forgot to have that husband of mine bring down one of the good chairs for me.
so he has two plush, adjustable in 400 ways, comfortable chairs at his desk.
and i'm still sitting in a metal folding chair.
i do love metal.
but not so much to sit on...
just to listen to.
har har har.

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