ooops

remember when i said i needed to answer some emails to my real life friends instead of spending all my time here?
yeah.
well...
dammit.
one of my bestestest friends is going through a really shitty time and i didn't know how bad it had gotten cuz i never answered her last email.
damn ME to hell.
i used to be the queen bee of great friends.
that was my one great talent.
and now, what am i left with??
a bad memory and a whole bunch of sel-absorption, i guess.
so she's on my list for today, but we'll see.
i guess today is big fat jerk day.
so have a happy one....

i know you're all sick of hearing about the many wild and wonderful ways my kids keep my life from being boring...
but this one's quick, and it's too good.
actually there are two.
first, as i was dressing the boys, i sent Max to find his belt.
he came back and said, 'i couldn't find the fuckin belt mom.'
aw crap.
and then a few hours later i was driving along and they were eating mini m&m's.
Max says, "mom, my nose hurts."
i ask why.
he says, "cuz i put a em-a-em in it."
by the time i stopped the car, blue was running out of his nose.
i had him blow into a tissue....
then there was chocolate running out of his nose....
fu-uck.
at least it wasn't big enough or solid enough to get stuck.
so...yesterday was 'thank god for melting candy in son's nose' day.
hope you had a good one.

wait a second.
i'm starting to feel like a cheap immitation of Girls Are Pretty.
i haven't been there in a while.
that site is so fantastic.

speaking of fantastic sites....
Go vote for The Hard Artist on Blog Madness.
Mostly cuz he's better than the guy he's up against, but also cuz he's just so damn cute.
and that should be worth something in this crazy world.

so it turns out that i am still as bad at saying 'no' to sales type folks as i ever was.
miss mary kay rep is coming to my house tomorrow to sell me stuff. i mean take my picture.*
she has now added "you have perfect skin" to my list of qualifications.
i wanted to tell her to eat shit, i really did.
but i couldn't.
she's way too bubbly.
and i fucking hate makeup.

one of my friends called me last night, all mellow and chilled out.
waaaay too happy, talking too slowly.
turns out she had had a panic attack and was on some drug for that.
she used to have them a lot, but this is the first one in about a year, i think.
anyway, it was really funny talking to her.
like talking to a stoned person...(from what i hear, at least.)
suddenly i was the funniest person alive.
although to be fair, we're those two who make each other laugh so hard, so often, so easily that people always think we're drunk.
but still.
it was weird being sober.
i wanted what SHE had.
well, minus the panic attacks.

*that reminds me. i've been dying to know what the tag is that puts a line through words i've typed, you know? so if you know how to do that, would you pleeeeeeeeeease leave it in the comments? i would say email me, but chances are i wouldn't read it.