then the phone wrong.
what the freud was that???
the phone RANG.
and i snuggled into my vast, crisp-sheeted bed to read it.
should i even bother to keep typing?
we answer phones, not read them.
that was scary.
but not in a jack nicholson in "The Shining" way.
waking up next to some ugly person and wondering where the fuck you left your car way.
not sure which is worse...
i have some busy days ahead...
i'm coking the feast for turkey day.
yes, i realize that says "coking".
maybe i like the idea of getting blitzed with my mother in law, okay?
anyway, it'll be fun.
i'm making the husband take the kids away for the whole day so i can cook in peace.
or in my birthday suit.
or in your birthday suit...
and here's the schedule for this weekend, since i'm sure you all have a space in your Palm for me.
palm PILOT. date book. et cetera--not some naked part of my body in your hand.
bunch of frigging pervs.
***tomorrow 1pm: window dudes coming to put in new windows which were measured for last week.
(note: why the fuck does a 7 year old house need 3 new windows? oh yeah: cuz it was crafted with the skill and care of a 4 year old.)
***friday night: husband home from stupid business trip
***friday night, two seconds after his arrival: crazy wild welcome home sex
***saturday: meet with real estate dude, spend time with step son
***sunday 7pm: pick up best childhood friend's sister from airport
***monday 11am: return her to the airport
***monday 12:30pm-3pm preschool thanksgiving feastie thing
***monday 3pm pick up babysitter, drop off kids, hit the road
wednesday? prep for thursday
thursday? cook, cook, cook, EAT (okay, eat, eat eat)
friday? recouperate/shop/lay around hearing myself get fatter.
i bet my thursday through friday plans sound very familiar to a lot of you.
awwwwwww---i feel so close to you now!
fat american bastards.