then the phone wrong.
what the freud was that???
the phone RANG.
and i snuggled into my vast, crisp-sheeted bed to read it.
nope.
wrong again.
should i even bother to keep typing?
ANSWER it.
we answer phones, not read them.
jesus.
that was scary.
but not in a jack nicholson in "The Shining" way.
more like...
waking up next to some ugly person and wondering where the fuck you left your car way.
yeah.
not sure which is worse...
i have some busy days ahead...
i'm coking the feast for turkey day.
yes, i realize that says "coking".
maybe i like the idea of getting blitzed with my mother in law, okay?
anyway, it'll be fun.
i'm making the husband take the kids away for the whole day so i can cook in peace.
or in my birthday suit.
or in your birthday suit...
and here's the schedule for this weekend, since i'm sure you all have a space in your Palm for me.
heh.
palm PILOT. date book. et cetera--not some naked part of my body in your hand.
bunch of frigging pervs.
***tomorrow 1pm: window dudes coming to put in new windows which were measured for last week.
(note: why the fuck does a 7 year old house need 3 new windows? oh yeah: cuz it was crafted with the skill and care of a 4 year old.)
***friday night: husband home from stupid business trip
***friday night, two seconds after his arrival: crazy wild welcome home sex
***saturday: meet with real estate dude, spend time with step son
***sunday 7pm: pick up best childhood friend's sister from airport
***monday 11am: return her to the airport
***monday 12:30pm-3pm preschool thanksgiving feastie thing
***monday 3pm pick up babysitter, drop off kids, hit the road
***for METALLICA/GODSMACK
tuesday? recouperate
wednesday? prep for thursday
thursday? cook, cook, cook, EAT (okay, eat, eat eat)
friday? recouperate/shop/lay around hearing myself get fatter.
i bet my thursday through friday plans sound very familiar to a lot of you.
awwwwwww---i feel so close to you now!
fat american bastards.
(myself included)
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