it is appropos of nothing.
or everything, perhaps.
so I was sitting at the park, while the kidlets played happily in the (soon-to-be-rain-filled)sunshine--
flipping through my course catalog,
working on the decision of which classes to take.
and.
something caught my eye...
I think I've found my major!!!!
ok, fine, so maybe it's short for "Comparative Literature", but jesus christ(superstar)!
how could they possibly abbreviate it like that???
maybe they're not the giant masses of pulsating perversion that I am, but that's no excuse.
to clit or not to clit?
some question, bubba!
ok, so I was just reading Maine's latest post--
(if you're not reading him, you should be
and one of his little segments reminded me of a girl I knew, back in the day.
"the day" being pre marital-vows.
so this girl, "Jen" we'll call her,
(mostly because that's the dumb twat's name)
was one of those girls.
one of those two-faced, lying, insecure girls.
the type I have only had the rarest of interactions with.
she was 17 or so when I met her,
and I was 21--
although I've always been mature for my age,
except for my propensity for Disney movies and Gumby toys,
but I digress.
anywho, we worked together, at a crap restaurant.
(yes, its specialty was dishes prepared with feces)
I dated this one guy,
and he was fucking hot.
looked a LOT like Bo Bice, actually.
there I go, digressing again--
which is better than transgressing, right?
am I right, or am I right, or am I right?
right?
sorry, post-gym endorphins...please excuse my temporary ADD.
so.
all she had to say about him was "he's too grungy, not my type"
blah blah blah.
always negative.
so then I dated this other guy,
frickin' hot.
his last name was "Long", and I know I've mentioned him before because his name, between Becky and I, is Fred* Long-who-isn't.
poor guy.
he was great in bed, and what he lacked in length he made up for in girth--
and hell, he was probably average length, it just couldn't be avoided, as the joke was RIGHT THERE.
begging to be told.
last name Long??? come on!!
fuuuuuuuuck.
ok, back on track.
so I dated two guys and she never had anything good to say about either of them while I dated them.
(yes "dated" is sorta code for "fucked". whatever.)
went home to Maine for the summer
(hahhaahahaha!!!)
and when I got back she had tried to score with one of them and was dating the other.
He was a huge slut, though, and would date anyone.
I was just using him for practice.
heh.
so ANY-fucking-WAY.
my point.
shit, I swear to god, I had one.
my point, was:
I decided that a good way to get her to date a guy was for me to simply tell her I had dated/fucked/kissed/lusted after him.
I tried it once, just for kicks,
and it worked.
sucker!!
(and she wasn't even good at it)
ok, that's enough of a catty post.
sorry...
I just thought of it, and as you may have noticed:
anything that flits through my partially-hydrogenated head,
is subsequently purged out through my fingertips.
it's just the way it goes.
circle of life, etc.
y'know.
___________
*Fred is not his real name, but I didn't think it would be very nice to put his whole name on here...
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