it's still not the 4th of July but everyone's pretending....

oh well.

we went to the water park today.
and discovered many things.
starting with:
I have PMS.
this revelation occured when i reached for my husband's hand in the car and he brushed it away and i burst into tears.
...he was reaching for his phone, to make a call.
it was NOT a subtextual comment on our relationship--past or future.
jeez.
fucking hormones.
oh!!
and yesterday...
husband was taking me to lunch, while we were at work.
we were approaching stopped traffic, at a red light.
a young woman was getting out of a car, and i said,
"damn! she's hot!"
...so husband comes within a half inch of rear-ending someone as he stared.
and stared.
this pissed me off more than it should have, considering I pointed her out...
welcome to hormone hell...

so, back to the waterpark...
i discovered that lots of people wear bikinis who oughtn't.
i also discovered that there are more hot people of the female variety at waterparks then of the male variety.
...either that or i'm a raging lesbo, in denial.
but really, there just were NOT any guys to check out.
and i mentioned this to the husband.
then a few minutes later i said, "wow! i take that back..."
there was a young man in a speedo--who had a pretty decent body...for a girl...
(eek! again with the lesbianism--not that there's anything wrong with that)

hmmm...what else did i discover?
oh yeah!
that lying on a towel...
on that fake grass stuff like they have at mini golf courses...
with a pool filled with fake blondes and man-made waves...
the sun still has a soothing power.
a warming, healing, softening power.
to wash away the spasms of PMS.

and then i noticed.
that going down those twisty, fast slides is even more fun than it was when i was a kid.
but i'm still really afraid of hitting the water at the bottom too fast and going under and getting water up my nose.
i'm a dork.
i used to jump from 50 foot cliffs at the limestone quarries at home.
heh.
the one cliff had this shrub you kind of had to leap over...
they called it the "Barbara Bush Dive".
heee.
yes, this was that long ago...
anyway, the point is, i hated getting water up my nose then, too.
the difference is--now i don't giving a flying fuck about impressing anyone so i don't do stuff if it makes me a teensy bit uncomfortable.
heh.
getting older is awesome.
and i've decided i'm going to start saying i'm 30.
just for the hell of it.
and then, when it happens, it won't feel like a change.
i'm all sorts of sly like that...

oh and on the way home, we drove past Utah Lake (this is not even remotely ON the way home...but we were in search of the perfect hamburger joint...sadly they were all packed and we ended up going to McGagald's.)
uh...anyway. where the hell was i?
oh yeah.
the lake.
over near the far side there were two columns of smoke rising.
at first we thought it was a fire on land--summer is fire season here, and there are always fires on the western mountains, and the eastern ones, for that matter.
anyway...
we began to wonder if the fires were ON the water because they didn't look like they were far enough west to be on land.
could have been two boats colliding, with the gas burning on the water.
it was kind of cool.
but i have no point, since i don't know what actually happened.
wow.
what a great story that was.

RAMBLING CONVENTION.

okay.
i'll leave you all to contemplate ways to silence me....