fucking daylight savings time

what a useless fucking annoyance that is.

...and this is what you get when i roll out of bed, hung over-ish, and try to write.
be glad you're not here.
my words can be lethal at this point in my day.
i've been known to send a fella to the hospital--bleeding ears, etc--for no more than an attempt at conversation before i've fully awoken.
or there's the time my husband said, "i love you" and was greeted with "you're a faggot."
daaamn, i hate waking up.

so anyway.

there's a reason i'm subjecting myself and you all to this.
and that reason is four beautiful letters, and mountains of large red rocks...
M
O
A
B

that friend whose arrival i've been anticipating...
well, mostly i didn't realize it was already the weekend of her arrival, cuz my head is rather lodged in my ass...
and also, she told me she'd be here today when in fact she arrived yesterday.
so.
the point is, we're leaving in a couple of hours for our quick adventure to the southern desert, and you won't so much as smell my words on the wind until Tuesday.
okay, okay, i'll be home tomorrow night, and knowing my obsessiveness i'll probably write something then.
or not.
and how great is my husband for letting me run off like this?
pretty damn.
that's how great.

just a quick note about last night, then i'm off to pack.

We had a gorgeous dinner, then went to The Passion of Christ...
for the record NOT a great pre-bar movie.
but we did get to see some Jesus ass, so that's good.
okay, okay.
it was a really beautiful, moving portrayal of something i haven't thought about in a while.
i couldn't watch all of the brutal stuff...closed my eyes for a few seconds here and there.
i can't stomach that stuff when it's so realistic.
i loved it; i felt it.
and i was the only one in our group to notice that Pilate spoke Latin.
do I know latin?
nah.
i'm just super duper smart like that.
he kept saying veritas and that just had to be latin for "truth".
didn't sound Hebrew to me.
and that it hit me: well, duh, he's Roman.

so then we hit the bar, all somber and tired from sitting.
do not try to pull the dinner-movie-bar thing.
i did not enjoy that combination.
played some pool, but i still suck at it, and i almost fell asleep.
oh yeah!
and the bar tender was someone my husband went to school with.
or partied with during the high school years, at least.
she was kind of hot, and sending that vibe of being cooler/hotter than me--all thinking she was hot shit cuz she knew my husband 10 years ago.
big fat hairy deal.
she's probably used to every guy wanting her, and that's cool--go for it, i say.
but the funny thing is, my husband is so not one of those guys.
he hates girls like that, and has a low opinion of her specifically.
he used to doink one of her friends, but so what?
i used to doink people too.
why be smug about ancient history?
i wouldn't have even cared if she was an ex of his.
...a testament to how hot i (thought i) looked last night.
and it also reminded me that i'm not in the least bit insecure about him.
it was kind of cool.
in our early years i might have been uncomfortable around someone like that.
it was just an interesting scenario.
girls can act so fucking weird.

we even left the bar before midnight, which is the first time i've done that in a long time--possibly ever.
i didn't even finish my SECOND beer.
what the bloody hell is going on here?
i know, i know.
i really am getting old.

but i get to go to Moab in a couple of hours!!!!
and you don't.
sorry...
but i figure if i throw in a little childish behavior once in a while, it balances out my crotchety old bitch behavior and i end up somewhere in the middle.
okay, fine i'm still a crotchety old bitch--just a childish one.
I am so excited to get caught up with my girl, too.
she's my anchor, my girl soul mate.
it's going to be a great trip.

just got an email from The Mirror Project, confirming my submission.
very cool.
you should all do it!

pathetically enough, i'll miss this warped little cyber world.
so have fun without me--but not too much.