well well well, you never can tell

It's true, you know.
life really is like a box of chocolates and you can never tell what you're going to get.
unless you have a good psychic.

and it rained today.
cold, slow rain.
the mountains were engulfed in clouds, and the air was fresh and clean.

at the gym, there was this girl.
my first take was, "too skinny, doesn't look like she wants to be here."
she was with her boyfriend, it seems--a guy i see almost every day, very serious about his workout.
so i looked more closely at her.
she had the most incredible eyes--
she was the kind of pretty that is painful.
she seemed disinterested, not engaged by this activity.
she was there to please him, surely.
but her straight dark hair, in their pigtails, poking out from a bandana/skull cap...
and her bony little hips showing between shirt and pants.
i don't know.
i just knew i needed to write about her.
those eyes.
piercing, yet sparkly--but a mirthless sparkle.

people are so interesting.
i could just sit and watch them all day, making up stories about where they've been and where they're going, why they laugh, why they cry.
and sometimes i know i'm right.
i can feel it.
i look at a person and see their life, not just their face.

and i remember once in high school, sitting on a stone bench at the far end of a corridor, afternoon light fading through the bank of glass doors to our right...with Emily, and we both had that electric shock thrill of recognition, of sharing something strange--discovering that we both do that, and that sometimes our emotions overwhelm us, and that connecting with someone so deeply is rare in high school. after that, she wasn't just my sister's frend anymore. she is mine, too. she is loud and funny, has an iq so far over genius level that it makes me blink, and boobs to match...gigantimus. and last year her husband told me i'm the pretty sister. me?? are you fucking kidding me?? my whole life it was J. people would tell me how pretty my sister was. thanks for sharing, and oh yeah--go fuck yourself. just what a 13 year old with glasses and braces and no clue how to handle her naturally curly hair needs to fucking hear.

and we're off to buy bikes.
for us, and maybe for the kids...
if they're good.

i've been offered a job.
am trying to decide if i'll take it...
probably will.
since it's flexible hours/location and decent pay.
i can work from home whenever i want, and go to the office whenever i want.
i can work as few or as many hours as i want.
and hubby said the money's all mine.
zippity doo da!!!!!!
can you say...shopaholics anonymous look out!!
i'm going to need a sponsor!
could i use a few more exclamation points?!!!!!!!!!!!

well, that's enough of my brain spillage for now.