Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Ok, let's all take a deeeeep breath here....

Well, unless you live near a paper plant, cuz CHRIST those are unpleasant.
It's been quite an exciting day 'round these parts
(no, not those parts, perv-o),
so I think I'll just relax and pretend nothing has changed.
I am super-tingly excited about all the delicious new folks stopping by, though.
Or for our barely-literate asswipes out there: I like nice people.
And I wouldn't exactly be prone to say "mean people suck", because, frankly...
it's more like, "sexy women suck (if you're lucky)".
I think I love you fine fellers.
(and for you newbies, I enjoy using "fella" as a unisex term, deal with it.)
(oh, and I like pretending to be all bossy, but I'm really, if you have a problem with the "fella" thing, please feel free to PISS UP A ROPE. ha! gotcha...)

That reminds me of how much it annoys me that English doesn't have separate words for the plural and singular forms of "you".
That is the one thing I got from all those French classes that has really continued to irritate me over the years
(that, and the strange little rash I caught from making out with the exchange student...)

Ok, so if you'll recall,
I got my car detailed today.
It was my first time...
and might I just say--
entirely orgasmic.
(Of course, that goes for any and all "work" that I should do but can pay someone else to do.)
Just thinking of how clean my car is makes me sneeze with joy.
It is so clean it sparkles...
which is quite a trick for cloth seats.

Just caught up with my oldest friend.
she is amazing.
she makes me laugh so hard I snort.
and you know what was great about it?
As I was regaining my composure, she said she didn't think she has laughed in months...
ok, that's the sad part, obviously, but the good part is that we laughed tonight.
She's getting ready to apply to grad schools, because she is finally sick of her free spirited life...
we were so much alike in so many ways, and have lived such different lives.
I love knowing that we're still the same silly little girls we were.
oh, good times.

I really think some of the negative comments I got today were hilarious.
especially the guy who stated that I am the reason the human race is getting more stupid...
Let me check that IQ test again...
yup, still huge.
And as far as what I personally have contributed to the human race--
My genes are doing just fine.
Two very smart little boys.
Which reminds me of how funny it is when people think that just because a person has children, she should no longer be sexual or sexy.
How about this?
I don't dress or act like a slut in real life.
I have a wickedly dirty mind and I love to express that.
My sexuality doesn't affect my children in the least.
...except for how happy their father and I are--we have great sex, and we love and respect each other.
I suspect that the majority of those were from teenage boys who have never seen real breasts, or at the most, they have seen some 15 year old's A cups.
Sorry to disappoint, boys, but natural Ds don't come much perkier than mine.
And, finally, some of those comments downright scared me.
Sort of a "what the fuck??" feeling.

Sorry to talk about...the reason that most of you are here.
I hope you cool cats stay a while.

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