Tuesday, June 21, 2005

It's two-fer Tuesday!

(not associated with Topher Grace, in any manner)

two for what?
you ask?
well....
let me just tell you!
two for Lisa's list of idiocy.
Firstly of all,
I had a checkup at the doctor.
new doctor.
lovely office, nice receptionist, friendly nurse.
(each of them has a sibling with twins, fyi)
the nurse and I decide there is a 100% chance they'll need a blood sample,
we win.
yaaay us!
so I prattle on...
telling her how small my veins are, and how dodgy.
little fuckers don't like to sit still for the needle.
foolishly,
I launch into the story of the time the borderline retarded girl stabbed me to death in a variety of locations and still failed to retrieve the blood sample.
that was ONE time out of probably 50.
everyone else has been successful, if not quick.
I'm tough.
I don't mind getting poked in the arm a dozen times in 5 minutes.
I do, however, rather dislike the feeling of a needle in the back of my hand.
so what did this nurse do?
well.
she gave it one try on one arm,
and then went for the hand.
apparently my story had her convinced it was the only way!!
you could say I shot myself in the foot there--
or the back of the hand, rather...

so then, it was off to the joy the is Wal-Mart.
you might think I"m being sarcastic,
but I'm not.
it's funny that it has a "trashy" reputation in most other states,
even in Maine i was wary of it.
but here?
EVERYONE shops there.
from those of us making 6 figures, right on down the line.
maybe it's because so many families are big families/single income, due to the mormon thang, or maybe it somehow fell through the cracks of this shallow, judgmental population as a faux pas.
I have no idea.
either that or I'm the only one who's not embarassed to be seen there.
anyway.
where was I???
oh yeah.
--at Wal-Mart.
so I wandered around, picking out an ironing board and a rubbermaid drawer thingy for sorting some of the kids toys, in their closet.
a little later, I dropped a muppet's movie into the cart.
I'll repeat that: I dropped a DVD into the cart.
blah blah blah, picked out some more stuff, checked out.
as I was walking out, I set off the alarm thingy.
I handed the lady my receipt, and she poked around a bit,
even mentioned that usually it's a CD or DVD that sets of the alarm.
I had completely spaced the Muppets, AND I knew I hadn't deliberately stolen anything, so I smiled and nodded and she let me go with a smile and a nod.
get to car, unload stuff.
hm.
what's that in the bottom drawer?
faaaaaaack.
it was the movie--inside the drawer.
I have no frigging idea how it got inside--
I guess the drawer must have been slightly ajar
(which is nothing like a bottle, just so ya know)
and it must have slipped in.
I looked at my watch and realized that I didn't have time to go back inside.
I felt bad...
but at least it was only a $5.50 movie from the "get this shit out of our store" bin.
maybe I'll take care of it next time I'm in.
and maybe I'll be a rebel--
lord knows I need a rush.

I'm not cut out for being married to someone who travels a lot.
I miss him.
but I'm not allowed to complain--
it's not in my nature, really.
I am supposed to smile and pack his stuff and tell him everything's fine.
because even if money doesn't buy happiness,
it does buy a secure future and that is important...
I don't usually talk about it on here, either,
because hubby doesn't like the idea of "anyone/everyone" knowing when, exactly, I'm alone.
he has a point.
I'm sure none of you are psycho stalkers,
but with the content of this site, it's not exactly a stretch to imagine it might happen.

later al-o-gators--

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