okay not really.
but i do...
so i was sitting in my car the other day.
in line at a drive through.
(I was NOT getting fastfood. well...maybe.)
and i noticed a young woman in the parking lot.
(good lord, i sound old--"young woman"?? fu-u-uck.)
she was a good 6 or 7 months pregnant.
aw, how cute.
her friend lit up a ciggy.
then handed her one and lit it.
i wanted to yell something out my window at her.
...but all that came to mind was, "put that cigarette out, you stupid cunt!"
that seemed almost as trashy as smoking while pregnant.
so today i am playing the part of the confused housewife...
Becky's ex-husband flaked on her so i'm watching her kids while she's at work today.
two boys, just like me.
they play really well together, so it's cool.
(just a friendly reminder that I really am A. boring and B. a housewife)
i have a pecan pie sitting on my counter...
and every time i go into the kitchen i am compelled to reach under the foil...
and take a bite.
--with the conveniently located fork...
i have to keep one in the pie dish!
i can take a bite every time i walk past...
(but at least i'm good at it)
yesterday at the gym i killed my abs.
this is always a good thing.
i also turned my legs to jelly--
which is my favorite thing of all.
apparently i have nice legs or something.
that's fucking great....
JUST put all 4 little ones down for their nap,
and the step son shows up.
apparently i do not deserve time alone.
the little guys weren't destined to fall asleep either, so it's okay.