I feel like I haven't posted in weeks...

And maybe I haven't.
But I'm here now and that should count for something.
Heh--is it just me, or is that one of the best classic soap opera lines?
I glanced at one of the TVs at the gym the other day, and saw a guy carry a girl off to bed!!!!
I can NOT believe they still do that shit.
Of you men out there reading, how many of you have EVER picked up a woman and carried her to bed in that style???
I have wrapped my legs around my husband before, and in that sense he's carried me (like a frontwards piggy back), but this business of scooping a woman up, one arm under her knees, one arm around her back--while continuing to kiss???
I dunno.
Soaps are evil for a lot of reasons, and this is just one of them.
That and the sheet-wrap.
Me, I prefer being fully, gloriously nude both during and after dainty or sweaty romps--
and anything in between.
It's fascinating.
I think I could write for hours on the subject of how daytime television is a lethal poison to the sensibilities of women everywhere.
Which is why I don't watch that shit.
however, as long-time readers may recall, my grandmother got all us little girls hooked on a few shows when we were very young--I was not yet in Kindergarten when I sat on her lap while she watched The Young and the Restless.
I distinctly remember a scene in a private jet, where there were young people and older people.
I knew that "restless" didn't mean "old" but I couldn't figure out the correlation--yes there are young people and there are some not-young people, but they're also not restless, so what the hell, CBS???
Oh the innocence of children!
So yes, I've watched my share of the crap (and could probably make a pretty good case for how it screwed up my perception of love/romance, but I'll save that for some time when I have more than 6 hours to kill) in the past and therefore consider myself an expert.
fuck off.

Ok, enough of that.
I really do feel like I haven't posted in a very long time.
That's probably because my mind was clouded by the slow-moving slug which was slipped into my ear by the thyroid fairy.
Fuck that fucker.
He/she/it is history for the moment.
I am feeling as normal as I ever feel, which, let's face it--
probably isn't terribly normal, but who cares??
Maybe I can even get caught back up on READING blogs,
wouldn't that be something??

I have a great song playing,
which for some reason is making me want to pole dance.
Or is that polka?
HA!!!
I made a jokey...
get it?
Polish dance...Polka...
DOT DOT DOT.
Ok, enough (bad) jokes.

It's snowing today.
And one of my little ones decided that he's had enough of the sniffles which have been plaguing him for the last few days, and he put his foot down:
he's staying home.
Poor little bugger--
he's not really SICK, so I'm making him be bored.
I just don't want him to get in the habit of saying he's sick just so he can stay home and play.
The result is every ten minutes, "Mo-o-o-m...what time is it?"
He seems to think that once school is over he's going to be allowed to play.
Sorry, dude, no fun for you!

I talked my husband into cancelling our pain-in-the-ass babysitter plans
(which included a 2-hour round trip drive)
so that we could just have yummmmy Hawaiian take-out in front of the fire after the kids were in bed (7pm).
It worked out very well, I think.
17.5 orgasms later, the neighbors would probably all agree.
Or not, depending on whether they have earplugs.
We both woke up this morning all glowy and saying, "Low-key holidays are the best!"

I also dreamed that alligators were trying to eat my children,
and I was involved in a suspiciously "Jeremy"-like school shooting--
I was the only person left in the classroom with the shooter, so it wasn't scary at all.
gulp.
I'm actually blaming the Olympics for that one, though, because of this super unstable figure skater they interviewed.
C-razy.

Ok, I guess I'm off.
For now.
Hope you're all having a happy February 15th.
Happy Birthday, Crispy.