Saturday, March 22, 2003
Sometimes, with all my romantic notions and silly daydreaming habits of yesteryear, I try to imagine the "perfect match" for me. I want someone whose heart will swell at the coming of spring like mine does and whose eyes will sparkle as we plan an impromptu weekend to the dessert for hiking and biking. Someone who will laugh from the very core of himself at the silliness of life and who will profess to me that the world would be dark without the light I provide, would be empty without the sound of my voice and would be cold without the warmth of my heart beating next to his. I want someone who makes me feel like a goddess even when we both know I’m still carrying around baby fat. Someone who will kiss me like it’s the last scene of a black and white movie and make my knees shake. sigh. but then I remember that I have something just as good, probably better and that it would undoubetedly do me good to be grateful for that. There is no replacement for the feeling of comfort you have with a spouse after 5 years of marriage, and all that entails. We have a great life, better than most. I am just such a grass is greener type--it drives me crazy!!! why can't i just be satisfied instead of always checking out my neighbor's lawn?? and i don't mean anything remotely sexual by that, even though my dirty little mind can't help but make a dirty little association. It seems everything is a dirty joke waiting to be told, you know?