Sunday, March 23, 2003

I'm feeling rather guilty about how lazy i've been this weekend so i'll make a list of things to do today, and when i complete the list i'll feel so good about myself!!

1. Lay on the couch.
2. Re-watch The Good Girl, since once wasn't enough.
3. Actively avoid doing housework. (see that, i turned something i should do into something i can say i've accomplished by not doing it-i'm wicked smaht like that)
3. Take a long hot bath--can't see the clutter with the bathroom door closed.
4. Teach 2 1/2 year olds to be obsessive compulsive...oh wait, they already are, just not about picking up their toys. (their ocd is confined to opening and closing doors)
5. Teach 27 year old husband to be obsessive compulsive...or at least to pick up after himself and/or the kids and or me.
6. Figure out how to add a comment section to blog. (oops, i already did that, but their new-member sign up is not working today.)
7. Nap.
8. Leave laundry in the dryer and in laundry baskets for folding tomorrow.
9. think mean thoughts about all my uptight Mormon neighbors.
10. think happy thoughts about my new next door neighbors and their Harleys and chainsmoking. sigh of contentment. there is a god--i am not alone in this prissy neighborhood anymore.
11. post to blog.
12. add a new favorite link to my sidebar.
13. drink a nice cold wheaty beer. (this is my favorite number, so i'll end here.)

Well, now i feel much better about myself. Self esteem is such a tricky little thing to manage, but I try. Have I mentioned lately how oppressive it is to live in Utah? I wish we could just export or exterminate all the locals and start over. Why the hell didn't anyone else want to live here???? Those damn 1800's Americans couldn't have gotten off their lazy asses and settled this nearly inhabitable place could they? I guess it took the desperation of a people who were not welcome anywhere else to discover such a truly god forsaken place, as it was then. Now, with all of modern technology it's a great place to live if you can possibly avoid contact with the annoying masses. And they're mostly just annoying because they are so like minded. people here all do the same things conciously, because they want to do what everyone else is doing, because it's cool, etc. they all try to look the same too. It's so freaking weird. I have never experienced a more cummulative keeping up with the Joneses phenomenon. I grew up in rural Maine and survival was much tougher--we were much tougher. I had the "when do we get to move out of this state?" argument with my husband again and this time he didn't even pretend. He has dropped the act altogether, and rather forthrightly admitted that he will NEVER move away from here. Great. I wish he could understand that this is cruel and unusual punishment for a crime that I didn't even commit. That's okay. One day I will tunnel my way out of this prison and he'll be sorry he didn't join me voluntarily. Or I'll be sorry I couldn't make myself be happy in Utah.

GAWD I love Lynard Skynard's Tuesday's Gone. I still believe I was born in the wrong decade.

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